Saturday, January 10, 2009

Do Not Collect $200


After a week's worth of discussions with my best buddy, it's been decided. She can't get past it.

The lack of landscaping "down there" has brain warped her to the point that she can't even think about asking Ms. Perfect (with the full bush) out on a date.

Shallow? Perhaps.

All of this bush hog talk made me wonder about you. What one thing would turn you off so badly that you'd let Ms. or Mr. Perfect walk away?

49 comments:

Micky-T said...

green teeth!
sorry...that's a bit over the top.

kimber p said...

weird as this may seem, I used to judge my potential lovers by their feet. (I say 'used to', because I'm in a 10 yr old relationship now) But seriously, I'd get a good look at their feet and the way they cared for their toenails and if they were gnarly or dirty or long..I'd get immediately grossed out. I love feet and so the way they look is important to me...lol

Dana said...

My biggest issue is personal hygiene. Body odor, bad breath (consistently), dirty hair, etc. Taking enough personal pride to put your best foot forward is a HUGE issue for me.

Brad said...

Where'd ya get Jay's picture?

Brad said...

oops - My Jay, not C.B.

SkylersDad said...

My one thing that is a complete turn-off is a smoker. Sorry, I can't get past it!

ciara said...

omgosh...that pic is so gross. he's wearing a freaking sweater for goodness sake!

oooo yuck feet

Gary Rith Pottery Blog said...

I would think SMELLY would be my biggest turnoff.

coffeypot said...

For her to stop paying for everything. :)

Zed said...

First off, let me say: Send Ms. Perfect my way, will ya? lol.
And, what would make me walk away from the perfect one?
Nothing, cuz they're perfect for me.
:)
but if they have bad breath I'm not gonna kiss 'em until they get it taken care of.

Beth said...

bad breath is a killer....smoking. Can't hang with that either. and being married might be a deal breaker too. ;)

Queen-Size funny bone said...

porr teeth, breath and body odor and crusty feet. i guess I'm fussy.

Grant said...

I wouldn't send Ms. Perfect away for any physical reason, unless she turned out to have a penis. Then I'd probably have to take time to adjust, and even then I could manage if he keeps shaving and makes with the anal sex.

Nolens Volens said...

Since you didn't SAY physical...lack of brains is the biggest turn off for me. My wife was bushy when I met her but she was amazed to see how shorn I was and she went bald, never again to look back. LOL

Lu' said...

Body odor, absolutely.

Helen said...

Lips I can't imagine kissing. You know what I'm talking about -- the weird slimy livery kind. Ew.

Biscuit said...

Well, that hair sweater would definitely be a NO. Otherwise. hygiene and manners, especially regarding eating.

Cap'n Ergo "XL" Jinglebollocks said...

I'm sorry-- after seeing Chewbacca there, I had to go and lie down with a cold compress o'er my burning eyes.

What was the question, again??

Fortune Cookies said...

that man is reason #762 Why I am a lesbian.
seriously, though, I'd have to say lack of intelligence and bad teeth are my top turnoffs. Oh, and odor.

Michael said...

Blondes.

Nulaanne said...

I would have to say lack of brains but I must also be one of the few out there who are repulsed but lack of hair on a bush. Trim it, if you wish, but little girls are hairless down there and I can't get past that.

Akelamalu said...

That furry back, sweaty palms, sloppy wet mouth, smelly feet..... I guess I'm lucky I got Mr. Perfect. :)

Scarlet said...

I'm with Lu'.

Get8More said...

I'm with Scarlet (I wish...)

Rikki said...

where on earth did you get that picture of my husband!

Luckily for me, yucky teeth is the biggest turn-off ever, but I'd like to think I possess enough savoir faire to tell him or her to quit being a douche bag and brush, already!

~*Jobthingy*~ said...

bad teeth is it for me.

*gags*

prissynotgirly said...

someone that smokes or chews ... no way ... i can't get over it

aside from that ... general grooming and cleanliness

i have a hair thing too ...last couple of guys i've dated even shave their arms because they have very dark hair ... i actually like less hairy men ... and i don't think i could be with a woman that doesn't shave either ... consider me shallow too i guess

Palm Springs Savant said...

well its important to remember that we can't change who people fundamentally are.

I couldn't handle chronic bad breath. eewww

CrystalChick said...

Really bad body odor is probably number one followed very closely by cigarette smoking. Since quitting like 10 years ago I've just become a bitch about that one.

Jay said...

Body oder.

Being a total dumbass.

Rude, hateful personality.

Stuff like that. ;-)

rage said...

Omg, I thought I saw a gorilla when I saw this picture (that is, before I saw that it was an actual human being)...Bah!

I would have to say that if someone didn't brush their teeth or if they wore their underwear more than one day in a row. Trust me, I've seen guys that have done this.

Gin said...

I agree with what Jay said. Personal hygiene is a biggie, but a lame brain and a hateful personality are right up there too.

Mik said...

Eating with the mouth open, a cigarette hanging out of the corner of the mouth while doing it is even worse.

Farting in front of me, come on, wait your turn!

Diva said...

Funky feet. If they are icky or stinky, there's no way.

phd in yogurtry said...

Hmm, bad breath? That would be hard to get past. And now that I think about it, I've never kissed a guy with bad breath (and I've kissed a LOT of guys).

The other obstacle would be a guy whose approach to sex was, "I got my nut, you go find yours" type deal. Nuh uh. BTDT. Never again.

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...man hands...

cats in the window said...

The Photo: a new rug for my den.

Ashleigh said...

Poor hygiene and being rude just for the sake of it.

Knight said...

Excess Saliva really freaks me out.

random moments said...

Halitosis. Bad, funky breath. Been there, left that.

Jormengrund said...

Deal breakers, eh?

Well, being married is #1.

Brains: #2.

Looks, depends. If you look like you haven't bathed in a while, and SMELL that way? #3

If you can pass those, but then get close enough to talk to and your breath makes my eyes water?

yeah. #4.

Other than that, I'm not too picky.

Vodka Mom said...

I love hair. p.s.


Body odor is a TURN OFF, however.

Vixen said...

How they treat ME and others is HUGE.

But I have to say, the personal grooming thing is big for me. Not a fan of body hair- anywhere.

Sinnerviewer said...

I hate to sound shallow but someone who just doesn't try too look good - especially a woman who really gets overweight. We've all put on a few pounds here and there but a woman who really gets fat sends a message that she is lazy or has no self-restraint and those are both turn-offs to me.

My GF used to date a hairy italian grrl with full bush who didn't know about how to groom herself. She just told her how much she would enjoy a trimmer bush and got her permission to use a beard trimmer. The girl maintained herself after that. No need to throw a good woman out for something that can easily be resolved!

Tina-cious.com said...

Bad teeth
Smelly
Cockiness

But see, I'd see all that coming so I wouldn't be at the point where your friend was before I had to decide.

It's toally just my opinion but -- I could see preferring shaved but not even ACCEPTING a natural woman?

Somethin' doesn't seem right to me there...

Holy Crappers said...

That picture is just nasty.


lol

peace
#2

Tiggerlane said...

Anything odorous...that would indicate poor hygiene. Greasy hair, bad breath, band FUNK smell "down there," etc.

Tina... said...

I've kicked a person to the curb for not being affectionate but when they wanted some booty. No public displays of affection ever.....jackass.

Turnbaby said...

If they didn't smell 'right' to me---I'm not talking stinky--I'm talking 'right--you know it when you find it---just lean into her neck and nuzzle and breathe in the smell of 'home'

If that's not there it's not happening