Monday, September 29, 2008

The Perfect Start to MY Week

She pulled into the space right in front of my office window. Hops out. Wearing shorts, a tee and her baseball cap. 

With a non-fat latte in hand, she walks in with a smile. 

How could I not love her with all my heart?

It's the perfect start to my birthday week!

Friday, September 26, 2008

Just Another Lesbian Fantasy

As I walked down the hallway to find my purse, I didn't realize that anyone was behind me. She closes the door, grabs my arm and quickly straps my wrist to a post. As I'm realizing that I'm being bound, she wraps my other arm with the same soft leather. Tight. I am stretched, but not too far.

I've had too much wine to disagree with her. She's bigger than me and suddenly I am wanting what she's giving. She slips off my dress as she kisses me. What's her name? Do I even care? I have no choice. During the moment that I was thinking, my legs are also wrapped in leather.

Her soft hands glide over my thigh and up to my hip bone. Her elbow forces my right knee down and out.

Her left hand makes a motion towards the door. In he walks. Bare-chested, with his jeans unzipped. He grabs the back of my hair as he comes around to show me his face. I know I am his for the evening.

I'll leave the rest to your imagination....

Have a wonderful weekend! Feel free to share your fantasy with me!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

And My Heart Flopped onto the Floorboard

On my way home today, I passed Gary, the 5oish guy from my old neighborhood that had Alzheimer's. He was walking alone along the side of a main road. Without Milo. (if you don't know the story, click on Gary first, then Milo.)

His head was down. He was walking so slowly. Barely putting one foot in front of the other. On the right path to his house. Just as I used to see him every day walking Milo. Except just a few months ago, his head was up and his step was light.

I didn't stop. I thought about it. But would he remember me? Would it frustrate him that he didn't? Would I be stopping for him or for me?

I wanted to do something for him. I just didn't know what.

If I could do anything for him...

I'd bring back his best friend. The one he counted on to get him home. The friend that didn't care if he remembered everything. The one friend he always counted on.

It just makes me so sad.

My Field Trip for Blueprints goes Green, White and Red

About an hour ago, I headed downtown to pick up a set of blueprints. I turned onto 5th Avenue. I'm looking, looking, looking for the address, when I see this:

What are the odds that my downtown travels would take me RIGHT TO the place I've been dying to visit. After reading of Claudia's adventure with fettucini, it was on my "to do" list. This is how I wound up spending entirely too much with at Lazzaroli's with Tommy Noodle. And yes, he laughs and calls himself Tommy Noodle. What a charming guy!

Tommy walks over and introduces himself. I tell him that I'm here because of Claudia. "Claudia?" he says, "Do you cook like she does?"

THAT made me laugh. Um, no. Not quite. But I'm trying.

He showed me the frozen ravioli, of which I bought the Pumpkin and the Lobster. Gah, I can barely wait to cook them! He suggested the tomato cream sauce to accompany the lobster. The pumpkin, I'm going to try with a brown butter and pine nut sauce. Wish me luck. Claudia? I may need your help with that one!

I also picked up some of the gigantic garlic! Let's roast it and schmear it on some toast, mkay?

A tube of tomato paste, of which I am freshly out, some everyday sea salt, and a lunch of stuffed shells and various biscotti later, here I am.

Who wants to have lunch with me today? Any takers?

Monday, September 22, 2008

I'm Creatively Fit

*click on image to enlarge

Over the weekend, I took a Creatively Fit class with Whitney Ferre of the Creative Fitness Center in Nashville, TN.

It was so. much. fun!

Paint any color you want. Paint the ugliest color you can find. Paste on fabric. Smash down some paper. Go over the same painting over and over and over. Dribble some paint. Slosh some down on there really thick.

And that was just on Friday night. Which was made ever so much more fun by the lady behind me that brought two bottles of wine!

Saturday, we just kept building the layers. Pasting. Painting. Globbing. Smushing.

Sunday, we covered the entire thing in a glossy epoxy that looks like glass. I wish you could see it. It's so cool looking! I've got to find some of that epoxy.

It was like being in 3rd grade all over again. And I want to do it every day.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Squeeze A Titty for Me...or Two!

40,000 Women Will Die This Year From Breast Cancer

This past week, I've been waiting to hear from one of my friends. She went for a mammogram. They called her back for a second one. Something odd was on the film.

My heart sank.

My aunt had both of her breasts removed. My grandmother had one of hers removed. It's brutal. Both to go through and to look at.

I can't imagine my life without this woman in it. I speak to her daily and I adore her.

Today, the results came back that it's a cyst. They think. She's going to have the cysts removed because her aunt died from breast cancer. She understands the risk.

I've added a link to the right of my site to fund free mammograms for women that need them. They are important to someone in their lives, too.

Monday, September 15, 2008

I Am Fat

I am fat because I eat too much.

I am fat because I don't exercise enough.

I am fat because I eat the wrong foods.

I am fat because I don't naturally move enough.

I am fat because I no longer have a thyroid gland.

I am fat because sometimes I like the way it feels.

I am fat because rarely does anyone hate me or make fun of me for it.

I am fat because it's hard work for me not to be.

I am fat because I don't try hard enough.

I am fat because sometimes I lie to myself and say it's okay.

I am fat because I'm afraid to be thin and attractive. I don't like the attention that I get from men.

I am fat because it proves to me that people like me for my personality.

I am fat because it proves to me that my lover loves me for my heart.

I am fat because I am not willing to do the work that it takes to be thin.

I am fat and that makes me an easy target. Both for you and for me.

I Need Something....

and I think it might be a break. Not from blogging. But from things in my life that have become tedious. Like working out four days a week with a trainer. Lifting heavy weight. Spending too much of my time trying to have muscles. Trying to be thin.

I want to nest. Clean the wood walls of the log cabin. Decorate the walls. Buy new and pretty things for the porches.

I want to go for drives with my girlfriend in the afternoon. Or for a long walk at the lake that is at the end of the road. I want to go to the movies. Go for a bike ride. Paint with my old aunts. Eat ice cream.

I want to just do what I want to do for a while. Is that so wrong?

Saturday, September 13, 2008


Genderqueer from Wilkipedia:

Genderqueer or intergender is a catchall term for gender identities other than male or female. People who identify as genderqueer may think of themselves as being both male and female, as being neither male nor female, as having a combination of male and female personality characteristics, or as falling completely outside the gender binary.

No longer are male and female the only ways to define oneself. It's okay to fall somewhere in between or outside of those definitions.

You know what? I think it's fabulous.

I've known so many butch women that just didn't fit in. They were so butch that they were shunned by some of the more femme lesbians. We called them bull-dykes back in the 90s. Or diesel-dykes. Neither of these terms were flattering. They weren't accepted by straight society and they really weren't accepted by some of our gay society either. How very sad.

I'm so impressed by how far we've come. When just thirty years ago, I had never even heard the term lesbian.

I'm so glad that people today have places to turn and words to use to define themselves. I hope it makes it easier for them than it was for many in my day.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Let's Just Forget

In the comments of yesterday's post, The Daily Rant ranted that we should forget the events of September 11, 2001 because it's divisive to our nation.



Is that really a viable option? Tell the entirety of our nation to FORGET?

I can certainly forgive those who consider America and Americans an abomination. But I doubt that I'll ever forget what happened.

I am in Tennessee. A very long way from where the tragedy occurred. No one I knew was in the towers. And yet, seeing any image from that day brings all of the helpless feelings back. Brings back the sorrow for the people who lost someone that day for a few hours or forever.

Forget that day. Let's just move on because some Muslims are hated and some people are inconvenienced. Wouldn't educating the idiots be a better plan?

Perhaps I am overly educated with my minor in Religion, but I doubt it. I understand the difference between extremists Muslims that want us dead and your everyday Muslim that is an American. No different than I am. An American. With a religious view.

Should we forget?

Do we have that luxury?

Thursday, September 11, 2008

September 11, 2008: Never Forget

There are so many things that I could say about this day. But I think you already know. You know how I feel. We all went through the same thing that day.

You saw the destruction. The people jumping. The people with hands over their faces, running.

But, I wonder how will we explain that day to our nation's children so that they understand?

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

I'm Just Not Satisfied

You know how when you want to do something nice for someone, who has done something nice for you, you want them to be blown away? And then it just isn't right.

The satisfaction isn't there, because it wasn't what you expected?

Kinda like that orgasm that you *almost* have. You think, "Oh, this one's gonna blow the roof off of the house!" Then it just fades into sensitivity. You don't want to keep trying. Just forget it. It's over and there's just no use.

Well, that's how I felt when I sent Dana from Amid Life's Crises flowers. She's been so kind and supportive to me. I wanted to surprise her. With flowers. She got this:

But I ordered THIS:When they asked me over at how happy I was with my purchase, I told them. Usually, I just shut the hell up and take my disappointment. But this just wasn't right. I stood up for me and for Dana, who deserved the Kaleidoscope that I'd ordered for her.

They responded:

Thank you for contacting ProFlowers. Please accept our apologies for the disappointment with your order not being as full as you thought. You are a valued customer and we want to resolve this issue to your satisfaction.

We would like to offer you a replacement, courtesy of our team at no charge to you.

Well, okay then.

I haven't told her yet that she has something else coming...tomorrow. But I'm not giving them another shot at cut flowers. Let's see how they'll do with something else on their site. I'm hoping this little gift rears it's head on Thursday! *wink*

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Bullet Dodged

This morning when I took Trace and Isaac out for the morning constitutional, I was in a hurry. I was already plying them with promises of treat-treats if they hurried with their business.

As they walked out into the little front yard, I spied her...or him. I'm not sure which one it was, but I think it was a girl one. A turkey. Alone. Wandering in the driveway.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

I do NOT have time to chase these fur-children all over creation while they are chasing a turkey.

I kept up with the hurry-hurries and you'll get a treat-treat. And they did. They hurried right back in to the house without ever seeing the Thanksgiving Dinner that walked just 15 feet away from them. Oh the fun that was missed by them!

I still can't believe they didn't notice her. Who knows if I'll be this lucky next time we encounter a ....what do they call a girl turkey?

*** I *do* know that the turkeys pictured are Toms and ours wasn't that large or at least her tail wasn't all poofy. And it's not my pic, just a lovely one that I found on

Friday, September 5, 2008

Wild Things Meet Isaac, The Terrible

Wednesday evening, we took Trace and Isaac into the back yard for their evening romp. And romp, they did. Off to the field next to our lot that is grown up and wild looking. They ran around chasing each other, sniffing, and peeing to mark the lot as theirs. I've not taught them much about how money works. They think it's all in the peeing.

After a few minutes, their sniffers start going wild. They're running in tight circles. I know that they're on to some critter. Heaven only knows what lives out here in the sticks.

Isaac tucks his head down and has his mouth closed as he does as he's told and returns to the house. He is not happy.

My love: Isaac, what's in your mouth?

Isaac, closed mouthed: Mwruthin

My love: Isaac, we can see that you have something in your mouth. Drop it.

Isaac side steps to avoid her hands: Freamy, murufin's in my mouf.

My love: Issac...GIVE IT TO ME!

Isaac: NRO!

Me, from the top of the stairs: Oh no, it it a baby bunny?

My love: I don't think so (as she grabs Isaac's muzzle), it has a tail.

Isaac just eyes her sideways as she tries to make him open his mouth.

She forces Isaac's mouth open, he is a good boy most of the time, there would be no biting. Inside is what I feared. The tiniest of bunnies. It was a leg hanging out of his mouth. Not a tail. I had to go inside. I'm too soft for these things.

The fence guys are installing this week and hopefully the fence will be up by next. I think the bunny population should help out with the fence bill.

***The above pic is a little puppy porn from our last trip to Jamestown. Doesn't he look sweet!?

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Media Free For One Week~

but not by choice. My love called the cable company last Monday. Too late. They were booked up and they couldn't come out and turn it on until today. A week later. I haven't seen a TV or computer screen since last Wednesday. Cruel.

But I have seen loads of cool, blue water that has turned my red hair into straw. I don't care. The new house has a little pool that rocks my ever-lovin' world! I put on my suit first thing yesterday morning and swam. Then again around 3pm. My girl says I should just use it instead of panties and a bra until winter.

We are finally in the new house! YAY! Crap is EVERYWHERE! Boxes are stacked upon boxes. Bathroom stuff is piled in the laundry room. Kitchen accessories are in the attic. But at least it's all there.

I have some information for you about owning a log home. It's damn dusty. Every log on every wall and every cross beam. Dust. If you're one of those vacuum loving folks, please come over with your Hoover, Dyson, or whatever you have.

I'll cook dinner!