Saturday, February 7, 2009

IPhone God Help Me!


Dear iPhone God,

Please forgive me for getting up extra early this morning to put on laundry and vacuum before I worshipped at the devil gym. It was that action that made me miss the call telling me that the love of my life had left her love of her life in her jeans pocket.


Oh dear iPhone God, I promise not to swear or kiss girls ever again if you'll let the trick that I found on the internets work. I shall place your progeny into a vat of dry rice and cover it. I will then warm the entirety in a gentle oven until I am forgiven or until the iPhone turns on. Amen.


My Love sounded calm enough when I told her the bad news. BUT, if I go missing and you don't hear from me in a few days....

P.S. I know someone's gonna ask and no, I do not check pockets. That's your job if *I* do the laundry.

41 comments:

tt said...

I'm with ya sister!! I don't ck pockets either...I make some spending Money afterwards though...coins and bills are all shiney and clean afterwards. Of course, the billfold and it's contents are in shreds...but hey...I got paid to do 'my' part.
Works for me.
Hard lesson for him...;(

Jessica said...

Oh no, crazy! I HAVE to know if that works!

rutibegga said...

Oh no! I might lose it if anyone washed my phone, and it's not even that fancy. Good luck!

Ghost Writer said...

OMG your oven is so clean!

Scarlet said...

Same thing happened here two weeks ago and my daughter hasn't had a phone since.

It's HER job to check her pockets because I do enough as it is.

Fu Manchu Dad said...

I would be VERY interested to know if that works. Did your lady not get the 5 dollar a month insurance with her phone? ATT will replace it if she did. The sim card will probably be fine and she can drop it in the new one. But if it does work, I'll use it next time one of my kids leaves his/her phone in their pocket.

FMD

Real Live Lesbian said...

And so the great "who cleans out the pockets" debate begins. I say it's the person taking off the clothes. She says it the person doing the laundry.

She has just threatened to stop "letting" me do her laundry. Oh dear God, not THAT! ;)

AT&T doesn't cover water damage and the iPhone has a sensor that turns pink. After a regular cycle and two washes, it is indeed pink! So, that won't work.

Queen-Size funny bone said...

I wish someone around here would threaten not to let me do their laundry.

Biscuit said...

I had the same problem. Washed my phone, dot turned pink. I took the battery off of the back, pack the phone in rice in a baggie, and waited. My phone recovered all of it's functions except...phone calls. Yep, I could text and surf the net, but I couldn't talk on it. Bummer.

phd in yogurtry said...

My son's iPod went thru the washing machine on two separate occasions, and kept on ticking. Mind blowing. Hope for the same fate with the iPhone.

Jen said...

I don't care if there is anything in the pockets. I wash, I dry, I fold and I put away. I do not check. If it's in there, it's getting a cycled tumbled water ride. That includes MY own pockets, 'cos you know, sometimes I forget crap too.

That is all.

Turnbaby said...

It's the job of the wearer I say.

And it's also the job of the wearer to withhold clothes that need special attention--such as NOT going into the dryer so that they shrink two sizes too small---not getting put in the hamper.

Yeah.

Good luck

kim-d said...

Good luck; hope this trick works. I carry my phone in my jeans pocket all the time; this makes me rethink that (but, then again, where would I put it). I wash money all the time. But an iPhone? Bummer.

Jeanne said...

We went through this same trauma with Old Dog's phone. After about a week (we didn't take any special actions) it dried out enough to work again. It never really would hold a good charge after that, but at least it worked.

Dana said...

I washed step-daughter's phone in much the same manner. I do laundry - I do not check pockets. Needless to say, husband's ex-wife was not pleased and actually demanded (ha!) that I replace the phone. I didn't ...

Amber said...

heehee, great iPhone prayer, hope it works!

Karen said...

Oh no! Oh no! I am having palpitations for you. I am a neurotic pocket checker. Almost to the OCD level.

tiffer said...

My rule is I do the laundry, he should empty his pockets. However knowing how he is I also check his pockets and whatever I find is mine to keep. I often get paid very well for doing the laundry!

Zed said...

I *always* check the pockets. why, you may ask, if I am doing someone else's laundry, do I check the pockets?
Ahem: Finders Keepers!
yup.
I wouldn't actually keep someone's i-phone, but I keep ALL MONEY found (Unless it's rent money of course) in pockets when doing laundry.
it adds up, AND it makes them check their pockets!
lol
I hope your sweetie's phone works soon.
What is the devil-gym?

Cheryl said...

I'm a pocket-checker. I just can't help myself. I'm also an iPhone owner and I would just die if I left it in my pocket and washed it. I wouldn't, however, be mad at the person who was doing my laundry if I was the one who left it in my pocket. I once lost the money I had in my pocket to buy an iPhone. Talk about being pissed off at myself...That was back when they were $400. Ouch.

Nolens Volens said...

I check MY pockets when I do laundry...and I have earned the right to chew my wife's ass out when she leaves something in her pockets because...she chewed my ass out ONCE for leaving gum in my jacket that she took without asking if I wanted it washed...and she forgets to empty her pockets all the time. hehe

Scriptor Senex said...

You have one very forgiving partner! I did the same to my son's Ipod and he hasn't spoken to me for twelve months. OK, I exaggerate but it was at least a week. Fortunately, it was under guarantee and we blamed the rain and got away with it. (Ooops have I just admitted to a crime on the web?)

Akelamalu said...

OOOPS!

I say it's the responsibility of the person taking off the clothes but I don't suppose my opinion will help.(:#

Lori D said...

Geez, I'd have to scale Mt. Everest on my knees as pennance for doing something like that! I have four Ipods in the house, no Iphone (yet), but a girl needs her tunes, for sure!

So did it work?

K said...

This is why I have a cheap cell phone.

I don't check pockets either.

Did it work?

Ashleigh said...

Yikes. I hope it works.

I say it's the wearer's job to check the pockets BUT since it's usually ME that leaves things in my own pocket and ME that does the laundry. I wear two hats and catch the contents early. I hate it when I leave kleenex in my pockets. Especially if it's a dark load being washed. Grrr.

Please check my blog to see if you can comment. I THINK I fixed it. Fingers crossed.

Gnightgirl said...

This post did almost make me hyperventilate; I'm rather attached to my own iPod Touch (pretty much the Iphone without the phone part). It was a gift from someone who thought I couldn't live without one, and they were right.

I'm a pocket-checker; when my son comes home and brings his buddies, I learned fast that soldiers dispose of their own cigarette butts in a pocket on the leg of their camo's. Nothing like dryer lint filled with cigarette butts.

In exchange: I get to keep all of the money I find. I have a jar for it right in the laundry area; it's mine, mine, mine.

Kathy said...

I check all of my pockets and I check all pockets when I wash everyone else's clothes as well. I've had an entire load of work pants ruined because my g/f left a pen in her pocket.

I always check now, regardless. Sometimes I check when I'm gathering clothes and then check them again when I'm loading the washer.

Thankfully we haven't had any electronics slips through the cracks. Hope it worked!

CheekyMonkey said...

WHO leaves their "love" in their pants pockets, anyway? Pfft... if it were true love, it would be sitting on your night stand. Buy her a new one. :)

Fortune Cookies said...

Oh no!! Hopefully there's insurance...
Here's to the iPhone Goddess, just for good measure:

Oh mighty and illustrious iPhone Goddess, please, please, please cast your forgiving eyes upon my dear friend Real Live Lesbian in her time of need. We ask that you use your motherly healing powers to amend any damage that her beloved's beloved iPhone may have suffered. We also ask that you help her beloved to remember that RLL was only trying to provide clean clothes, and that one should never EVER leave such a cherished and honorable device in one's pockets to begin with...
Merry meet, merry part, and merry meet again!

g-man said...

My wife has dropped her crack-berry in the toilet a couple of times. pulling the battery out (Immediately) and letting it dry has saved her from having to ask for a new one.

Good luck.

g-man said...

Oh yeah, as for the pockets, it is up to the wearer to remove any thing form the pockets. (And to turn pant legs and sleeves right side out).

Spiky Zora Jones said...

I totally agree. It's their job to make sure there is nothing in their pockets.

My son...Oy!

I check now though as kleenex is so messy after it's washed, huh?

I think he did it on purpose. :D

Ciao honey.

kimber p said...

there's no phone or gadget that is worth giving up kissing girls...

;)

Lynette said...

AMEN!

Vixen said...

Doh. I never check pockets either. And I really, really should. I have an almost SIX YEAR OLD BOY. Duh!

But really, giving up kissing girls?! That seems awfully rash..... ;)

~*Jobthingy*~ said...

oh no! i guess all phones go to heaven at some point. some more early and cruel then others.

dry rice ROFL. where do people come up with this

Love, Evolution, and Resilience said...

OMG! This is freakin' hilarious!

Love, Evolution, and Resilience said...

OMG! This is freakin' hilarious!

Love, Evolution, and Resilience said...

OMG! This is freakin' hilarious!

Love, Evolution, and Resilience said...

OMG! This is freakin' hilarious!