Tuesday, June 9, 2009

How Could You Even Speak To Him?

I have an old friend and she has a new girlfriend of about a year. The new girlfriend invited us over when they first met and I met her brother. Lovely guy. Gay. Cute. Fabulous taste. And funny! We immediately clicked, but I never saw him again. He did however, hit me up on facebook. And occasionally we chat.

Unfortunately, my friend's new girl and her brother do not chat. They had some kind of monetary falling out and they just can't seem to get past it. My old friend, of course, stands by her girl.

Sunday, they came over for a cookout and I mentioned that I'd chatted with Matt online about the party.

"How could you even speak to him?"

Fortunately, lots of conversations were going on in the room and like an old lady, I just ignored it. That's one thing that I like about being in my 40s. I don't have to respond to everything. I don't have to answer every question. I don't have to explain myself.

Because frankly, he hasn't done anything to me. Why wouldn't I talk to him? I think what's going on between the siblings is just that. Between them.

And if you do take sides....and they make up....how do you make up with that person if you've blown them off for something that wasn't even done to you?

23 comments:

Jude said...

You're right. You're not involved in the tiff and there's no reason why you need to take sides. That my Dear is 40's sense.

Mike Golch said...

your friends are your friends and no one can dictate who you care to talk to.

Nolens Volens said...

No need to say anything here when the first 2 comments took care of everything. Oh wait...why say anything at all then? I'll STFU then! LOL

SkylersDad said...

Why do you even listen to Jude and Mike?

Oh, because they are spot-on, that's why!

Ashleigh said...

You're right and when you're right. You're right.

Gina said...

You are TOTALLY in the right. And I can't wait till my 40's if that is the bonus! :)

Akelamalu said...

YOU are right. Don't get involved in their sibling squabbles.

Bina said...

Excellent point. I often wonder about people who take sides when really, the situation has nothing to do with them. My sister does that, and needless to say, none of us other kids talk to her anymore.

Bond said...

You are totally correct in your stance here...no win situation of you get involved...

Jay said...

Everyone else's fight is not necessarily your fight.

I don't like to take sides either. And when someone tries to make take sides, that's when I take the other person's side. ;-)

Karen said...

You are SOOO right. I try to judge people by how they treat me and those I care about.

So just explain to me how I am supposed to maintain a relationship with my brother AND my sis-in-law once the divorce is finalized??? I have been thinking about this constantly and I haven't blogged about because my sis-in-law reads.

Gary Rith Pottery Blog said...

see, that's it indeed, you get a little older and ignore this and that

Grant said...

I'd probably avoid mentioning him again, but otherwise I'd just stay out of their fighting and hope they leave you out of it as well.

CheekyMonkey said...

"Over facebook, that's how." is how I would have answered her.

That's just ridiculous. Period.

Queen-Size funny bone said...

why must there always be a gathering of warriors when someone is in battle with another?

we're doomed said...

Exactly!

Biscuit said...

We actually had a friend lose a friend because he spoke to us. The friend he lost was the girl Rob dated before me, and we ran into them in a restaurant. We chatted with the guy while she kept her back turned. Afterward, she told him that he had disrespected her by speaking to us and that they couldn't be friends anymore. And this was a woman in her 40's!

Laura said...

I agree....stay out of it. DO exactly what you are doing - because you arent personally involved!

Spiky Zora Jones said...

that's right baby...you don't have to answer to anyone...well other than maybe your girl.

But that's it...everyone else can take a flying leap through a rolling donut, m-kay. ;0)
Ciao honey.

Scarlet said...

Your last paragraph (although it's a question) SAYS it all.

Isabella Snow said...

I totally agree with you.

Lynette said...

love that we have finally learned we are not here to make others happy or comfortable.
just enjoying our own lives as they intersect with others.

rage said...

Exactly, I mean...why take sides. We're not in the 5th grade anymore.