Typhoid, Hepatitis and Flu, Oh My!

Here's what nobody tells ya:

There's going to be a few shots involved in this trip. Well, that may be a bit of an underestimate. Yesterday, I went to my regular doctor since my heel's been tender from the dreadmill. I have a tendon issue and wanted to get a cortisone shot before I left. Easy enough, huh?

The doc started asking questions about where I was going and had I had a tetanus shot lately? Um, no. How about Hepatitis A &B? Um, no. Pull down the britches, Missy. The hiney's gettin' some action!

Four shots later, I popped by the travel doctor to see how they're coming with our Yellow Fever vaccines. I much prefer to chat in person when I'm begging. The nurse told me that they'll have two vaccines next Wednesday for us...hopefully, they'll have all three. She's ordered them, but due to it's rarity, it's hard to say for sure if they'll receive the extra shot. Wish us luck on that one. The other clinic STILL hasn't gotten their Yellow Fever vaccine in. I'm playing them off of each other. Whoever gets it in first is where we'll head to.

Would I like to see the doc while I'm there? I've already been at the hospital for two hours...what's another? He spent an hour with me. He goes over with me the itinerary and in which areas malaria is prevalent. I have a malaria pill prescription to get filled along with a pill for altitude sickness and some antibiotics.

Have I been vaccinated against typhoid? Say hello to typhoid up there in the pic. Again, no. The flu? Shit, are you kidding me? Apparently there's an epidemic in Nashville.

Nothing can get me now! Mwaahahahahahah! I'm totally impervious! Except I'm feeling a tad sluggish today. Maybe they've ALL got me.

Not Your Standard Fare

Last night, I took my girl on a date to the only remaining townhouse in downtown Nashville, The Standard at The Smith House. As we walked up to the grand entrance, snowflakes softly floated around us. We pick the table by the front floor to ceiling windows that allowed us to look out onto the tiny courtyard and towards downtown Nashville.

The Standard is absolutely stunning in it's Victorian ways. It's like walking back in time to the 1840s as everything is perfectly restored.

From the impeccable waiter, we ordered the Zolo Malbec to accompany her Chicken Oscar and my Chilean Sea Bass, which was topped with saffron beurre blanc and served with jasmine rice and snow peas. It's one of the best meals that I have ever had. Honestly, if you're in Nashville, you've got to try this place!

On our table was a little historical information that is detailed on their website. The Smith family bought the home lovingly restored it with hundreds of thousands of dollars. As I was reading, I came across a line that said that Andrew and Rachel Jackson had taken their wedding vows in front of the fireplace mantle in the ballroom when the mantle stood in another nearby home. I just HAD to see it!

My uncle Jack has always told me that you'll never get what you want if you don't ask. Typical of my family, I asked. I requested to see the mantle. The waiter said that he'd be happy to show us.

A few minutes later, Joshua Smith, the owner came to our table. He told us to grab a glass of wine, because we were going to tour the entire place!

Absolutely fascinating! He explained how his father was a pastor and they always had a smallish home. In 2005, his parents and siblings decided to buy the grand home and the entire group moved from Memphis to restore it.

As he walked us around, he showed us the unexplained trap door in the side room that was installed in the early 1900s. Was it to hide the 'shine during prohibition? We may never know.

He showed us the courtyard that will be a wine bar for locals this summer and talked of plans to restore that area as well.

Then off to the back room to see the fireplace where President Jackson was wed. It's amazing to me how it sits back there in all of it's historical glory. I wish it could talk. Was she nervous that day? What did she wear? Was he all ruffled up for the big day as I've seen in so many pictures? Was it their first wedding that was not legal because her divorce wasn't final? Or was it their rushed-up second wedding that led to the duel where Andrew took a bullet for his love?

Joshua really made our evening. The food was wonderful, but when paired with the grand tour it made for an evening that will not be forgotten.

We will be back and we'll be bringing friends! Who wants to go?

When Are We Leaving?

My uncle Jack and I are in the office, chatting about the upcoming trip. Looking for a hotel room in La Paz, Bolivia where we will be staying the first night. We must have a confirmed reservation for a hotel before they will give us a Bolivian Visa. I find a site where folks have reviewed The Hotel Rosario positively. It looks beautiful!


Me: Ok, so we'll need one room for the 6th, right?
Jack: We leave on the 6th, so we'll be arriving the next day. We need the room for the 7th.
Me: Your itinerary says you arrive the 6th. I'm leaving the 5th.
Jack: You're going to be lonely that first night.
Me: (in my head: OHHHH SHIT! Sinking feeling. Prayers for airline gods begin.)

I call American Airlines where my mother had given me enough miles for Valentine's Day to fly first class to Bolivia. I figure that they will charge me out the ying-yang to change the dates IF they even have a seat available.

They were beyond nice. The lady that I talked to was wonderful. No charge. No problem. She booked me onto the next day without event. But, no first class seats are left for the flight to Miami. I'll be in coach for the first leg. No biggie.

I'm a big girl with a lot of junk in my trunk. She says that she'll send the information to research, so perhaps they can find a way to put my big, ol' bootie in a bigger seat. I'm so impressed with American Airlines. I big, red puffy heart them!

Now, who wants me to bring them back an alpaca? Are they cute or WHAT?

By The Hair Of My Chinny Chin Chin

My uncle Herman has been traveling in Utah for the past two weeks and got back into town yesterday. We've been waiting for him, so we can all go get our Yellow Fever Vaccinations together.

Yesterday afternoon, I casually called the Travel doctor that is 2 minutes from me to get us scheduled. I mean, how many people travel to South America in the Winter? Apparently, a lot. They're booked for Yellow Fever Vaccines for the next two weeks.

She goes on to tell me that it is now considered a RARE vaccine and they wait until they have 5 people to share a 5-dose vial.

I leave in 14 days. I need to have the vaccine in my system for 10 days for it to be effective.

I called another doctor at Vanderbilt University. They have none. Zero.

Fuckity.

They give me another doctor to call that's at Fisk University. He's the only other one in town. I call. Get cut off. Call back. Put on hold. Get returned to the operator. Put on hold some more. Finally, the original operator returns.

They can get us in next Monday. Exactly 10 days before we arrive in Bolivia where we must have a Yellow Fever Vaccination Record to enter the country.

Whew.

Since I'll be on the brink of being immune, I looked up Yellow Fever on The World Health Orgnization's website. This is the actual picture from their site. Am I going blind? Or is this the crappiest pic on the planet for YF transmission patterns?


What is Yellow Fever, you wonder? Here's how the WHO describes it:

Yellow fever (YF) is a viral haemorrhagic fever transmitted by infected mosquitoes.

Yellow fever can be recognized from historic texts stretching back 400 years. Infection causes a wide spectrum of disease, from mild symptoms to severe illness and death. The "yellow" in the name is explained by the jaundice that affects some patients, causing yellow eyes and yellow skin.

Oh, and guess where else we may be going? Paraguay, of course!

NEW information from WHO:

A small outbreak of yellow fever occurred in Paraguay in early 2008. This is the first outbreak since 1974. All the confirmed cases reported by the national health auntorities come from a rural area of San Pedro Department in central east Paraguay. WHO now recommends yellow fever vaccination for all travellers to affected areas in Paraguay.

Just Let Go!

This morning, the uncles are telling me that we may change our itinerary. Mkay. That instead of Machu Picchu and Peru, we may go to Brazil and Argentina.

My uncle wants to see Foz do Iguaçu or Iguazu Falls.



From Wilkipedia:

Vastly larger than North America's Niagara Falls, Iguaçu is rivalled only by Southern Africa's Victoria Falls which separates Zambia and Zimbabwe (this is excluding extremely large rapid-like falls such as the Boyoma Falls). Whilst Iguazu is wider because it is split into about 270 discrete falls and large islands, Victoria is the largest curtain of water in the world, at over a mile wide and over 350 feet (108 meters) in height (in low flow Victoria is split into five by islands; in high flow it can be uninterrupted).
I have no clue where we'll end up.

My two uncles are modern day adventurers. Seriously. They've been everywhere and have no fear. They'll eat eyeball soup and drink God-knows-what for lunch. But I've never had cooler vacations than when I'm with them.

They're hoping to find "someone" to drive us from Bolivia over to the falls or maybe we'll take a train or a bus and then we can just fly out of there.

This is an exercise in letting go for me. I'm a planner. I'm going to be in this city on this day and do this. Not them. They fly by the seats of their pants.

Look at me!!!! I'm letting GOOOOOOO!!!!!

Know Thyself

I know that you all are smarter than I am, so I have a question for you. I'll be flying with my aunt and two uncles in (gasp) two weeks and three days. They made the reservations below.

Now, I can get cranky when I'm in an airport for too long. Especially after being on a long vacation.

I'm seeing a problem with the return flight. Serious problem. There's a 7 HOUR layover in Miami. Doesn't anyone come to TN from MIA anymore?

How can I get around that? Can I switch tickets with another carrier? Will someone fly me on their private lear jet? I'll bake you cookies! Seriously, there HAS TO BE A WAY! Right?

Please God...let one of my readers be a airline brainiac!

Here's my itinerary:

Your Itinerary

?

Carrier	Flight Number	Departing		Arriving		Cabin Booking Code	Flight Status Notification	Flight Details	Seats
		City	Date & Time	City	Date & Time
AMERICAN AIRLINES	923	BNA Nashville	Mar 05, 2008 02:00 PM	MIA Miami	Mar 05, 2008 05:05 PM	First Z			3F
AMERICAN AIRLINES	922	MIA Miami	Mar 05, 2008 11:10 PM	LPB La Paz	Mar 06, 2008 06:30 AM	Business U			6F
AMERICAN AIRLINES	922	LPB La Paz	Mar 18, 2008 06:55 AM	VVI Santa Cruz	Mar 18, 2008 08:05 AM	Business U			1F
AMERICAN AIRLINES	922	VVI Santa Cruz	Mar 18, 2008 09:15 AM	MIA Miami	Mar 18, 2008 03:50 PM	Business U			1F
AMERICAN AIRLINES	410	MIA Miami	Mar 18, 2008 10:40 PM	BNA Nashville	Mar 18, 2008 11:59 PM	First Z			3F

Happy Monday, Ya'll!

Just Booked!

On March 5th, I'll be leaving for Peru and Bolivia for two weeks. I'm so excited! I haven't been anywhere big in a few years, so I'm long overdue.

My cousin backed out on a trip with my uncles. There was a spot open. I raised my hand without any clue how I would pay for it. Then my mother gave me enough miles for a first class ticket. Happy Valentine's Day to me!

Now I just need about $1,500 more. Let me know if you need my address to send the check!

After seeing the road to Machu Picchu, I think I'll take the train.

For That Special Someone...

Giant Microbes offers these darling little plushies for that asshole in your life that's so hard to buy for.

The hardest part is deciding....

I Want You Beside Me

Last night, I was at my parent's house shooting the breeze and keeping an eye on my Daddy who had taken a tumble onto his head yesterday. He refuses to go to the doctor. Stubborn assed old man.

Anyway, we were cutting up and joking about his demise in a typical Southern style. My mother blurts out that this will be the perfect time to "check on the plots." She wants to go to the cemetery where she bought our family four plots when I was a baby to make sure that they didn't bury my Dad's parents in our section. She thinks that they did.

She doesn't want to be beside my grandfather for all of eternity. Never you mind that she'll be dead. It's as if there's some grand dinner party after death and she'll be stuck by people that she doesn't want to chat with.

Me: "What do you want them to do if they did bury them in the wrong place, dig them up?"

Her: "Maybe. I don't want to be beside him."

He pissed her off when I was a baby by saying that my father was acting a fool over me. And why wouldn't he? I was adorable with big, blue eyes and dimples! Apparently, he wasn't impressed.

Forty two years later, she's still mad about it. I'm betting she'll be digging his ass up and moving him! Do not piss off a mother.



Geek Alert:
Matt-man just told me that he is getting a Delivery Failure Notification email that goes back to my email address. He's assuming it is being generated by my blog response process.

Anybody else having this problem? Know how to fix it?

I Wonder...

Recently, at my tiny gym, there has been a debate. Mostly about one guy.

He doesn't talk to women unless he's interested in them sexually.

WHAT?

Are you kidding me?

One of the women that works out at the gym is in his training group. They meet at ungodly hours in the morning to train. She's over 6' tall and can bench around 300 pounds. (I think I'm tough benching 125.) She's massive. Without drugs. We're all drug-free. But she's very nice and interesting. And spots him when he's benching over 500 pounds.

Anyway, he has no use for her. Rarely speaks to her. Because he wouldn't want to sleep with her. That is his reasoning.

My question is....

Is this guy a throwback to the Caveman? OR do you guys think that way and just never tell us.

Shhhh....Don't Tell Her!

Yesterday afternoon, I watched Okra Humprey as Martha Beck, Louise Hay and Cheryl Richardson talked about The Secret and the power of positive thinking.

It really made me think about the power of my thoughts and words. How do the things that I think affect my life? Could changing the tracks in my brain actually change my life?

I was thinking about all of that this morning after I hit the snooze button.

We're looking at buying a new house together. Major step. The house that we want is a tad out of our price range. Could changing my thinking make it possible?

They said to start thinking and writing down the things that you want. Test their theory. See if what you want will actually come to pass.

So, right there in bed I started. I started thinking about living in that new house. About having a healthy body. Being an athlete. An artist. Having sex.

The alarm went off again and again I hit the snooze button.

My girl turns over and starts the sweet stuff. A little morning delight ensues.

Oh. My. God! It works!

And Now For Some Of The Rest of the Questions

Roger said... My sister is a seasonal Lesbian, thats what I call her lol. She cant make up her mind, she will go out with a guy for while breakup & then say "all guys are assholes", then she will go out with a girl for while breakup & say "well girls talk to much" My question, is my sister going nuts?

Your sister sounds like she's squarely in the middle of the queertinuum. And she's right. All guys are assholes and girls do talk to much. If she's dating men and women...she probably already IS nuts!
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RockDog said... In less than 10 words, what is the meaning of life?
and
Hot Lemon said... What's the meaning of life? (hell, maybe you know and if I'm too shy to ask, I'll ne'er find out!!)

Have fun and learn all you can. I have three words left, but I think that sums it up.
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Blissfully Wed said...And now I can't think of a darned thing. Ugh. Can I take a raincheck on the offer? We'll buy you a drink at a local watering hole sometime.

Of course! My favorite past time: drinking and talking. You're on!
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Dana said... I've heard that the lesbian community can (generally) be somewhat judgmental and exclusive and that they do not look highly upon women who have been with men - that somehow they aren't "real live lesbians" if they've been tainted by men. Is there any truth to this?

Kinda. I remember when I was younger that this was the case. However, as things have loosened up and more straight women are crossing over...not so much. We're just happy to have the new blood. And not everybody figures it out before they're married or have dated.

We actually discussed this at breakfast over the weekend. Everyone at the lodge had had sex with a man. I haven't since 1981. I won.

One of us had a three-way with two guys only a year ago. She was bored. WTF? I've NEVER been THAT bored!

One of us had been married and the other two had had boyfriends into their 30s.

I was crowned Ms. I'm So Gay!
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Aunt Jackie said... I'll make my question sexy :) What is your favorite way that you and your girl sexually please one another? What is the one move that your girlfriend does that sends you reeling over the edge??

Oh my! Well, frankly, I like it all...but my favorite is cunilingus with penetration. And to my sweetheart...that little thing you do to my ass at the very end...perfection! Yeah, I want it ALL!
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motherx said... Are you happy? and have you ever been in a straight relationship beforehand?

Yes, I am happy. Which is odd for me, because I never have been before. I'm not sure if it's because I'm older and don't expect one woman to be my "everything" or if it's because my girl is so great. And no, I guess I haven't really been in a straight relationship. I had boyfriends when I was 15, but I don't really think that counts, do you?
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There...more answers to the questions that inquiring minds want to know! I have some more...but I thought that was enough for today. I've gotta keep you guys coming back!

This is my busy time at work, but I'm making my way around to you all! If you haven't seen me, I may have been by and not had time to comment...but I am reading. Trust me. I know what you're doing.