Monday, January 25, 2010

RERUN: Jump, I Mean JUMP!!!!





It's 1982, my Mustang is white and looks just like this one. Down to the pin stripes and red interior. I'm a Junior and allowed to drive my own car to school. But I can't seem to remember to turn off my lights when I get there. I am constantly walking out to find my battery is almost dead. I blame it on the hormones of being 16.

On a warm March afternoon, it happened again. Except this time, my battery is dead.

I'm in 2nd Period Photography class with a bunch of football types and I know they're still around for practice, so I head for the gym. I see James, a 350 pound friend and I know that he'll help me.

"James! Hey, I need some help. I left my lights on and now my battery's dead. Can you jack me off?"

I never will forget that day. A guy left his lights on in the parking lot last week and came in looking for jumper cables. I just keep my mouth shut during these times. Because I *know* that I'll say JACK when I mean JUMP! And that ain't EVER happening again! ;)

17 comments:

Jay said...

Hahaha .. I bet James still tells that story too. ;-)

Mike Golch said...

Oh man,How many shades of red did you turn??

lesbo said...

HA!
ohmygoodness.
did you just die during that moment?!

Awake In Rochester said...

LOL! Thanks for the laugh. Do you still keep you lights on due to hormones? @@ te he.

James said...

Pretty funny. Don't know where you would have got the word "jack" from in this context..but you are forgiven these things when you are 16.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Too funny!

furiousBall said...

i stuck with the phrase "give me a jump", but i guess if you swap jack with jump there, you might get an 8 ball

Howard Bagby said...

Very funny. How often were you reminded about in school?

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...Ha! truth is funnier than fiction!

SkylersDad said...

Jay is right. I bet that story is still passed around!

Lynette said...

funny funny
but know what
my 22 yr old college girl (who just happens to be an amazing lesbian too!) is currently driving a. . .
1986 Ford Mustang with Red Interior too! Can you believe that!
The car is one year older than she is. Just made you feel old, didn't I?

nitebyrd said...

I'm sure you can still hear the echos of laughter. That is too freakin' funny, RLL!

Bond said...

bwahahahahahaahahahaha

OK, this is one funnnny story

Bina said...

Just what a 16 year old girl needs. ANOTHER reason to be embarassed about high school.

You poor thing. But holy hell that was FUNNY!

Dana said...

BWAHAHAHA!

GregoryJ said...

That's why I always practice what I'm going to say.
And then screw it up anyway.
I have a car now that turns the lights off for me. Before I got it, I had to jack off a lot.

Linda Medrano said...

LOL funny! Okay, when I was about 25, I was working for Chevron Corporation and had a co-worker named Michael Hunt. The bastards I worked with sent me from office to office seeking Mike. Like a fool I walked in and asked in my clear loud voice "Have you guys seen Mike Hunt?". Much hilarity ensued. Pricks!