Douchebag

One of my love's old friends (also ex-boyfriend) came up to spend the weekend with us. He seemed okay when I'd met him a few times down in Georgia. When he arrived, I realized that I'd been mistaken. All he wanted to talk about was his weenie and politics.

This Douchebag:

Showed us his lack of tan line on his bootie and incessantly talked of lying out naked.
Peed in my back yard by turning his back, instead of going into the house. Three times.
Spoke of wanting a penis enlargement, so that it would hang down to his knee.
Started an argument with one of my best friends about politics.
Said the N word in the car on the way to dinner.
Came out to have coffee with me on the sunset porch in just a t-shirt and a thong.


Two of my favorite definitions from Urban Dictionary:


A person with a shitty personality that needs to "take themself the fuck down" or "go home and get their fucking shine box." A douchebag usually assumes the form of a hair-gelling pretty-boy but can also be described as an overzealous, pompous, or vexatious asshole that most people wish were killed with a Mortal Kombat fatality.

and....

An individual who has an over-inflated sense of self worth, compounded by a low level of intellegence, behaving ridiculously in front of colleagues with no sense of how moronic he appears.

Have a little fun with the douchebags in your life:

Douchebag Name Generator