Guest Post: Needle In The Haystack, Chapter 7

It was time to check in with Emma. As much apprehension as I have – most of it stemming from my own excitement yet uncertainty – I've decided to move forward with the meeting. It's just lunch, right? I sit down and compose a welcome back email.

Hi Emma!

Hope you had a safe and enjoyable trip to Vegas and aren't too "weather shocked." Seems winter came in with a vengeance today!

I suppose this is as good a time as any to address your question regarding meeting others' expectations ...

Well, it's been kind of a cornerstone of my life. I'm an only child and the expectations (behavior, grades, etc.) were high. I always had a goal to meet, but it was usually set by someone else. That continued on through most of my life. Now mind you, I haven't always done things in the order they were expected (as was the case with finishing my degree late in life), but I've met the expectations of family none-the-less.

Specifically in regards to my attraction to women, the expectation from my family was that I would meet a nice man, get married, and provide a grandchild. Because I do have an attraction to men too, I just kind of shoved that other side of me in to the deep crevices of my being. I could be - should be - just as happy with a man. A traditional, heterosexual relationship.

As life went on, it became more and more clear that I was denying an integral part of my being. I came to a place where I realized that I could love more than one person simultaneously for the different qualities they had. I also admitted to myself that I really don't have a gender filter when it comes to attraction to people. The attraction lies in the qualities of the person, not in the gender of the person. That said, I believe there are some basic personality differences in men and women (generally) and that they offer different satisfactions of my needs/desires.

Now, I've built this little life of expectations - the husband, the career, the home, the kids. I fulfilled the expectations of others, but ignored (for the most part) my desires. Yes, some of the expectations of others were also mine, but there has been this chunk of life that I've set aside and I'm just not willing to do that any longer.

The trick is in being true to myself while protecting the interests of those I love. I don't want anyone hurt in this process - the goal is not to create drama, but rather to explore my needs/desires in a manner that is still respectful to them and to me.

Are you lost yet? It's not an easy thing for me to explain even though it feels quite concrete.

I'd be interested to hear your thoughts ...

LouAnne

Wow! If that wasn't a page full of thoughts, I don't know what is. This was the first time I had really put all of this down in writing. Before, it was nothing more than a swirling of thoughts through my brain – always in motion, but never quite settled. Writing it down, and sharing it with Emma, made it far more real.

Again I had to wonder if maybe I'd said too much – or not enough. But this time, I didn't check my email every 5 minutes. I made the decision that being honest was going to be a critical part of this intimate friendship.

Within a few hours, Emma responded:

Great to hear from you, LouAnne -- I just re-read all our correspondence and, I must say, it's been an interesting exchange to date.

We had a wonderful, relaxing time in Las Vegas. Didn't end up doing all that much gambling, but we had a lot of fun doing endless walking, people-watching, dining and, at times, going our separate ways -- David to the sports book to wager on horse races and football games and me to the shopping mall and the pool, where I did a lot of reading. The weather was perfect -- in the low 80s. All in all, it was a great trip.

I found your latest e-mail very interesting. It sounds as though you are a true bi-sexual...perhaps more so than most of the women who post in the W4W section. The idea of not having a gender filter is fascinating. I wonder if that is true for me as well. I think, for multiple reasons, that I prefer to have a man (the right man) for my life partner. But for a sex partner, as I said before, I lean toward women. Actually, my dream scenario would be to have my primary sex partner be a woman, with an anonymous man showing up at the 11th hour to help finish me off (with the aforementioned marvelous creation) under her direction. And you're the first person I ever admitted THAT to!!!

Not sure how I came by my interest in women. Of course, it may just be genetic. Or it could have something to do with the fact that the most thrilling sexual experience of my formative years was with a neighbor girl during a sleepover. It involved nothing more than giving each other light chest rubs...and we didn't even touch each other's nipples. We took turns lightly tracing spirals that grew tighter and tighter around each breast, drawing ever closer to the nipple. I remember lying there, in exquisite agony, wishing desperately that she'd drag a finger across my nipple. She was probably wishing the same. It didn't happen, but the sexual tension left an indelible impression on my adolescent psyche. Perhaps as a result, I have always had a particular attraction to breasts.

Well, now you know things that none of my family or friends know. Isn't cyberspace correspondence amazing in that regard?

I'm looking forward to what I expect will be a wonderful visit on Saturday. I'll be looking for you at 1 pm. Saturday in the Nordstrom's shoe department at Franklin Mills, near the women's athletic shoe section. Actually, I did a ton of shopping in Vegas, so I don't feel as though I need as much time for it at Franklin Mills as I'd originally thought I would. So if you'd prefer to meet at noon or 12:30 instead, just let me know. Or later than 1 for that matter. Whatever is convenient for you is fine with me.

See you soon,

Emma

I think I read her email seventeen times before I could stop for a moment and breathe. I could so easily put myself in the position of laying naked next to her, giving her light a light chest rub, tracing those very spirals that grew tighter and tighter around each breast, drawing ever closer to her nipple. However, in my fantasy, her nipple would not be forgotten. Not only would I touch it, but I would lick all around it, and embrace it with my warm, tender lips. And that would just be the beginning.

It has now been two days since she sent that email. I am contemplating my response – should it be tender and understanding, or should I share with her how I see the replay of this childhood memory playing out as an adult? We will be meeting, for the first time in three days, and already I know that I want to kiss her.

Hey Ya'll...It's ME!

I'm recovering from a little cloud in my chest. That's what they saw on the X-Ray yesterday. A little upper respiratory infection that makes me sound all sexy, like Brenda Vacarro!

Fortunately, I'm on some good meds and am on the mend for my date with Fortune Cookies this Saturday! I'm so excited to meet my local blogging buddy!

I'm picking her up at 10am and she's going to have some fantastic coffee ready for me. Then we'll head to a "Take Flight" art workshop where we'll be using mixed media to either get rid of something that we want to send out into the Universe or bring something closer. Should be lots of fun!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now, about my guest blogger....

How're you liking the blossoming lesbian story? It's fixin' to get really good! I've already read the next installment, but you know how I like to keep you all on the edges of your seats. You'll just have to wait a little bit to find out what happens next.

I'm wondering what you think about it though.

Is it cheating if your husband said...20 years ago...that he wouldn't mind if you did something like this? Should she tell him what she's doing? Why do you think she's keeping it a secret?

Would you be okay with it if your wife decided to have a girlfriend?

What do you think the pitfalls of this could be?

Could you/would you entertain the thoughts of a little girl on girl action on the side? Would your husband mind? Would you tell him?

Remember, this is really happening. LuAnne is meeting Emma THIS Saturday!

Guest Post: Needle In The Haystack, Chapter 6

I told Emma that I would call her that afternoon between 1:30 and 2:00. At 1:35, I headed to the lobby of our building at work and at 1:37 I dialed her number. It rang three times …

Emma: Hello?

Me: Is this Emma?

Emma: This must be LouAnne!

Whew! She knew it was me and I actually managed to sound (I think) somewhat casual in the conversation, but this is also where my greatest concern was. Would there be dead space now that introductions had been made?

Fortunately, Emma – once again – took the lead. There was, however, one awkward moment – a moment where it became clear that I was not the first woman with whom she had had phone contact. About a minute into the call, Emma asked, "So it was you who responded to my ad, wasn't it?"

Well shit! Either she's playing this game so hard she's got several pots in the fire, or I've not made very much of an impression on her. This was not where I wanted this conversation to go.

I gently reminded her that no, she answered my ad – the needle in the haystack, remember? She was extremely apologetic, but honest as well (a quality I appreciate). She let me know that yes, she had talked to a few women recently – there had been somewhat of a resurgent interest in an ad she place on Craig's List sometime back, and then she repeated several facts about me – specifically – that put me somewhat at ease. We agreed that yes, a meeting at Franklin Mills was the next logical step.

All-in-all, the call went fairly well, and with the exception of that one, uncomfortable moment, seemed promising. Feeling like I had just interviewed for a job, I thought it was appropriate to send a "Thank you for your time" email. I wrote:

Hi Emma!

Just a quick note to let you know how much I enjoyed our phone conversation this afternoon. It's always interesting and fun to put a voice with the written word.

As I recall, you and your husband are headed to Vegas tomorrow - here's wishing you a safe, but frolic filled long weekend!

I wasn't sure if there would be a response or not. A common theme continues to run through my head – even more so with the "slip" during the phone call. Is this a woman who has been at this for quite some time or is she really the woman she portrayed herself as via email? Am I in over my head? Moments later I received her reply:

Funny you should write me. I was just going to send you a note apologizing for the mental lapse re: who was responding to whose ad.

It's not that I'm pursuing loads of possibilities simultaneously. It's just that, for whatever fluky reason, a couple ads that I placed weeks ago have suddenly attracted interest. I'm not accustomed to corresponding with more than one person at a time. Hence the confusion.

In any event...I was very interested in the reference in your previous e-mail to your desire to be who you are meant to be vs. Meeting others' expectations. Care to elaborate on that before we get together? I promise to write back with something that I hope will be equally interesting (not sure what yet) on myself.

Have a good evening,

Emma

At this point, I'm not sure what to make of all of this. Being over 40, and having been around the block a few times, I've grown a bit cynical. Her explanation makes logical sense, but my own insecurities are playing devil's advocate. Emma is headed out of town though, which gives me a few days to see how I feel about things – and to answer a few more of those difficult questions I've been asking myself.

For instance, if I am serious about pursuing a lesbian relationship, why am I not first ending the relationship with my husband?

Some would say that it's because I'm not really serious about it – and they'd be right to a certain extent. At this point, I am not willing to pay the price (socially) to publicly declare my sexual orientation. I'm not willing to risk my family until I am certain that these feelings I have are real. I've also not ruled out the fact that my husband might actually be fine with us adding this type of relationship to ours. At some point, assuming things go as I expect they will, I'll have to broach the subject with him.

Will I lie? Plain and simple, yes! I will lie to my husband to meet up with Emma, although it will be more of a series of half-truths. I will likely tell him nothing more than I am meeting a girlfriend at the mall for lunch. True, but not the entire truth.

Will I lie to Emma? I honestly don't know. I don't want to – and right now I cannot imagine there being a need to – but if I am lying to my husband it would be somewhat presumptuous of me to claim I wouldn't lie to Emma.

What if she's an ax murderer (or stalker, or a man, or any other number of "What-If's" that must be considered when meeting someone online)?

I think, meeting in a public place somewhat removed from my home alleviates some of that concern. The only personal information Emma has is my cell phone number. I can say, with the utmost certainty, that this first meeting will stay "public." Precautions will be taken for safety.

I've got four days to think about all of this while she is in Vegas with her husband. I continue to remind myself that as excited as I am, I do have the option of backing out at any time. Oh hell! Who am I trying to fool? This meeting will happen – it has to happen – I need for it to happen.

Guest Post: Needle In The Haystack, Chapter 5

It became clear, early on, that Emma and I were both capable writers. As is often the case, I just assumed that most people write well but quickly discovered that "most people" don't read Craig's List. This was confirmed be Emma's next response:

You certainly know how to write, LouAnne...which separates you from the CL pack right out of the box.

Your background is very interesting. Definitely more bi than mine, as I never so much as kissed another woman on the lips until a few months ago. But my sexual fantasies have always centered on women. I've had a very solid sex life with my husband for 20+ years and cannot imagine a more wonderful mate. But in general, I'd have to say I'm slightly more attracted to women than men (though I do think the penis is a marvelous creation).

As I analyze why I've finally decided to act on this desire to be intimate with a woman, I think I've reached a sort of "carpe diem / now or never" point that's my version of a mid-life crisis. The trigger may have been the death of my dearest friend about a year ago. She died of a very aggressive cancer that spread from organ to bone to organ within a period of months. I had known her for over 35 years. She was my maid of honor, the godmother of our oldest child and closer to me than many sisters are. While I have many other casual friends, she was my only truly close friend. Our relationship was strictly platonic, but it was also very intimate. So I'm thinking her death left a void that this adventure of mine is seeking to fill, in part, in a different way. That's just speculation, but it seems almost too much of a coincidence to think there is no link between the two developments.

In any event, I'd be delighted to chat further with you. I believe I already gave you my cell phone number -- XXX-XXX-XXXX. If, after we talk on the phone, we feel it makes sense to get together, one possibility would be to meet on Saturday, Nov. 1, when I'm thinking of heading to Franklin Mills Mall to do some power shopping. This Thursday, my husband and I are flying to Las Vegas for a long weekend so that would be the first open weekend for me. Of course, I'd also be happy for you to come down to DC if you so desire.

Look forward to speaking with you,

Emma

Clearly, my attempt at dragging this out via email wasn't working very well. Emma had given me her phone number - again - and was expecting a call. Not only that, she was proposing a date for a meeting. I should be excited, right? Thrilled that she seems as interested in me as I am in her? Yet there is one thing causing me a great deal of anxiety – I hate talking on the phone. This isn't a debilitating anxiety, but it's pretty darn close. It's a challenge for me to call to order Chinese take-out. What's worse is that this is an irrational fear and I know it. I decide to be upfront and honest with Emma, even if it makes me seem ridiculously insecure.

Thanks for the compliment Emma! I enjoy writing and find it to be somewhat of a lost art these days. Seems that texting has gotten the best of the under 40 crowd and the grace of phrases as simple as "Are you?" have been replaced by just letters - somehow r u just doesn't do it for me!

I had to laugh at your "I do think the penis is a marvelous creation" statement. I find the same to be so true. In fact, the human body - male or female - can be quite erotic in its own, individual way.

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your friend, but do appreciate you sharing the story with me. Sometimes it takes a significant event to put things into perspective. I know I've had a bit of my own mid-life crisis - one where I needed to evaluate the life I wanted vs. the life I was living. I've known for years who I am, but have been afraid to be that person. I like to think that as I get older societal pressures and assumptions mean far less.

I have a confession though - I have a bit of a phone phobia. I know ... sounds odd ... but I think it stems from my need to be able to read the body language of people I speak with (something I've found to be far more dependable than just listening to the words). That said, I do think making contact with you on the phone is the next, logical step. Would tomorrow (Wednesday night) work for you?

I am also quite excited about the prospect of a trip to Franklin Mills Mall. It's only about a 90 minute drive from here. I have no plans for that weekend, so it would work well for me. I suppose it is best for us to discuss that further during our phone call.

I am a bit envious of your long weekend trip to Vegas. Do enjoy yourself!

LouAnne

Again, I found myself fretting over her response. Here I was, telling a "stranger" - one that I'm hoping to learn more about - that talking on the phone scares me! Great … I guess I could just wear a sign around my neck proudly proclaiming "I'M A NUT JOB." I was certain this latest exchange would have her running away quickly. Instead, I received this reply:

Thanks for the nice note, LouAnne. You raised more questions than you answered, which will make for a very interesting meeting when we get together. Phone call doesn't need to last long -- we just need to verify our gender. Re; shopping...just as you admitted to a phone phobia, I have to admit to a distaste for shopping. To me, it's a necessary unpleasantness, so what I'd like to do is do our shopping separately and then get to the enjoyable part -- where we meet, have a glass of wine, maybe have some lunch and get to know each other. If it feels right and the wine goes to our heads, maybe we hit a dressing room together for a bit of preliminary exploration. Or maybe we hit it off, decide we'll meet again and leave it at that for the time being. Or...worst case scenario... We decide it wasn't meant to be. In any event, I get the feeling from our few exchanges to date that you and I could, at a minimum have a fascinating conversation. So I'm glad you're up for it.

Why don't we pencil in a date for a long, leisurely lunch at Franklin Mills on Nov.1?

You could call me for a very quick conversation tomorrow during the day, if convenient.

Talk to you soon,

Emma

The only thing standing in my way of this fascinating woman was dialing 11 digits on my cell phone. How difficult could that be? It was the longest 2 hours and 37 minutes in my recent memory.

Guest Post: Needle In The Haystack, Chapter 4

In true, Oh-my-God, did I really just stumble upon exactly what I was looking for? style, I crafted a response. I was concerned – this was the first real prospect of something more and I didn't want to screw it up. It was like being in middle school again – those same butterflies – those same insecurities rearing their ugly heads. I decided to go for a simple reply, addressing her concerns, yet letting her know I didn't see these as concerns at all.

Emma,

Thank you so much for taking the time to responding to my CL post. I was quite intrigued by your response. If I'd have been even more specific with my hopes, you'd have fit them all!

I've got quite a diversified professional background. I went back to school a few years back and received my bachelor's degree in accounting. Fortunately, I was able to secure a position with a bit of flexibility and close to home, allowing me to maintain a reasonable balance between professional and family life.

I don't know that you you being in the DC area is a drawback at all. In fact, due to the need for discretion, one might consider this a bit of a bonus. You are right - the pickings are slim on Craig's List for the over 40 crowd - I really did feel I was looking for a needle in a haystack.

I am actually not from New York originally. I'm a Midwest girl - born and raised in Omaha - but life has taken me from coast to coast and now I call New York home.

I've attached a photo and I look forward to hearing from you again!

LouAnne

I pushed send and waited. I was concerned about the picture I sent, taken just moments before. I stood at the bottom of the staircase in our living room, still in my "business casual" attire from work. Would it come across as stuffy? Would I be what she was hoping for? Would seeing the photo keep her from responding? It had been only a one-sided exchange and yet I found myself unreasonably hopeful.

Within a few hours, there was a new message from Emma. The subject line hadn't changed – was that a good sign or a bad sign? My apprehension in opening the email was illogical. I opened it – it read:

So nice to hear from you, LouAnne. I feel as though I've already told you quite a bit about myself but here's a bit more:

I have two sons, 23 and 20. The older graduated from college last year and is working as a sales rep for Google.com. He's a natural at sales as it turns out, and is loving his job. The younger is a sophomore at Georgetown University.

My husband is 20 years older than I, but is very youthful and fun. He knows nothing about this yen of mine. However, I asked him many years ago if he viewed an extramarital relationship between two women as being equivalent to a woman cheating on her husband. He said he did not so, although he doesn't know it, I'm holding him to that. He is an absolutely wonderful man. But not surprisingly, he's at the stage of life where he's less interested in going out, having new experiences, etc. Luckily, he has always been very supportive of me doing my own thing so I'd say I pretty much have the best of all worlds -- a loving husband and a lot of freedom.

I'd love to hear more about you...the course your life has taken, your current family situation, and why you feel you have this interest. If you'd rather speak by phone, you can call me at XXX-XXX-XXXX. Or you can send me your number and I'll be happy to call you.

Emma

I wasn't expecting a phone number. This was moving far more quickly than I was prepared for. I was thinking there would be a few weeks of email exchanges prior to the need to speak on the phone. Suddenly, I was feeling extremely shy and insecure. I decided to respond via email – to see if there was more that I could tell her in hopes of learning more about her.

Good Morning Emma!

Do you ever have one of those weekends where one activity spirals into another and you are actually grateful for Monday morning because you get to go back to work? Yes, I had one of those! Nothing out of the norm, just constant activity.

Let's start with a bit of family background ...

I have been married to my husband for just over 2 years, this is a second marriage for both of us. We have quite the blended family. I've got a 20 year old step-daughter (currently attending Columbia University - my husband's adopted daughter), and a 14 year old step daughter (my husband's biological daughter - she lives with her mother and we have visitation every other weekend). I have two sons from my previous marriage – one is a freshman in high school and the other is a senior.

I actually had my first sexual experience with a woman when I was 18. In my early 20's I was involved in a somewhat long-term relationship with a woman and her husband (my interest was in her, however he was aware and supportive of the relationship). I had a few more isolated experiences up until the time I got pregnant with my son. It was then that I felt I needed to identify as "heterosexual" rather than what I've always known myself to be - bi-sexual. I really do enjoy relationships with men and with women - intellectually and physically - but wasn't OK with the implications that desire would have on my son.

My husband is aware of my past and was - prior to getting married - supportive of my desires. Honestly, it's not something we've talked about since. My inkling is that he would want to be a part of that relationship and - quite frankly - this is a relationship that I would like to have independent of him.

I wasn't quite sure how to develop this type of relationship - what I'd likely classify as an intimate friendship - with a woman. I live in a very distant and small (4000 people) suburb of New York, where 75% of the families are quite traditional - dad works outside of the home - mom stays at home with the family. I work in the same suburb for the only large employer located here. It makes it difficult to pursue anything other than what is expected – a traditional 2-parent home with 1.7 children, where mom is a PTA member and attends every school function. I am already a bit of an outcast working outside of the home.

I actually wrote the CL post at the encouragement of a "cyber friend" who was aware of my desires and thought it might be an appropriate avenue. It wasn't until I read the other postings - and received some of the other responses - that I realized just how much of a needle in a haystack I was looking for and how unlikely it was that I would find such a person on CL ... and then there was your response! A wonderful, welcome surprise!

That's the Reader's Digest condensed version of where I am and how I got here. If you are still interested in continuing with exploring this friendship (and I do hope you are), please let me know and we'll arrange a time to talk on the phone!

LouAnne

Guest Post: Needle In The Haystack, Chapter 3

Questions. They always make me think, especially when they are questions that I've asked myself a million times. Did I really want another woman who was in a heterosexual relationship? That was any easy one – YES! But that next part – the why – that wasn't so easy, or was it?

I knew exactly why, I'd just never said it out loud. A woman in a heterosexual relationship was safe, or at the very least, safer. You see, in my world that would mean she would have every bit as much to lose as I did if boundaries were crossed. She'd be less likely to become obsessive – her status wouldn't really allow for that type of time commitment. She'd need to hold back a bit emotionally to keep the status quo at home. In other words, she'd never be able to love me the way I deserve to be loved. Being with a woman who was already in a heterosexual relationship would allow me to test the waters before having to make a commitment to my own sexuality.

You see, when you've lived over half of your life denying who you are at the core, it's overwhelming to even consider the idea of sharing that with the world. It has the potential to impact everyone and everything you've so carefully crafted to continue the denial – from the relationship with your children and spouse, to how you are perceived by your neighbors and coworkers. Everyone is proud to say they have a lesbian friend – everyone is fascinated with the idea of kissing a girl and liking it – but to make a public statement of loving women? That takes courage that I just don't have right now. Yes, I wanted a woman who was in a heterosexual relationship – it would be easier to keep my emotions in check.

It wasn't long before responses started coming in. It wasn't an overwhelming response – more like a trickle, and what an an interesting mix.

First there was Tiffany, a married 40-something woman looking for "a gal friend, someone to be close to, get to know, hang out and have a relationship with." Her email was friendly, but also had a few spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors. Was I being a snob by being so judgmental of her writing? I wanted to be able to connect with a woman on an intellectual level. I worked hard on my Craig's List ad – I hoped to get responses that were well written and articulate. I realized this was going to be one of my primary requirements for continuing contact. I got similar type emails from several other women. I did not respond to any of them. If I was going to put myself out there, I wasn't going to settle - settling is how I ended up marrying a man.

The second email was from Julie. It was the first "negative" response I received. I was prepared for this – I know there is a bit of a hierarchy in the lesbian world – those who look down on women like me. Julie wrote:

blah blah blah Jesus im surprised your husband has not left you lol you want to play shut up ask for my number be ready to meet and play if not go to a chat room

Needless to say, I didn't respond to Julie, and I held my breath in hopes that I'd not get any additional responses like hers.

There was Stephanie, another married woman who shared my desires and background. She was well "spoken" and we exchanged a few emails. She sent a photo in her second email of her at a company picnic. She had a cigarette in her hand. That was a deal breaker. Superficial? Maybe, but I just couldn't see myself getting past that.

Melissa responded, and there were several proverbial red flags in her email. One of her first questions was "What is your race?" Again, I understand that we all have preferences, but when that is the first question I read I start wondering if this is someone who might be closed-minded about many things. Additionally, she was single, childless and wanted "regularity and accessibility." She was also quite sexually explicit in her initial response to my ad. I'm not a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but when you've not taken the time to get to know me and your email states that you like, "getting my pussy ate and breast sucked," I'm a little taken aback. Although the physical aspect of this potential relationship is important to me, it isn't where I want to start. DELETE.

Then there was Sue, who turned out to be a bot, trolling for folks to log on to a singles XXX site to see her photos. I didn't access the link, but I have no doubt I'd have needed to join the site, pay a fee, and would never have found Sue.

Maybe I really was looking for some unrealistic ideal – being too picky. My intro on the ad, "Looking for a needle in a haystack," was meant to be an attention getter. I was starting to believe it was a premonition … that is until I received a response from Emma.

Emma. If I'd have hand picked a respondent for my ad I couldn't have done any better. Her first email was articulate, eloquent and contained just enough information that I wanted more. She was within my age range, a professional, married with grown children and exploring her sexuality – owning up to what she had always felt. Although her experience with women was limited, she was honest and upfront about what she hoped to find. Better still? She considered me educated and refined. She had only one concern – geography.

Emma wrote:

How nice to see an ad from someone in my age range. I'm a happily married, full-time professional with two grown children. Have been drawn to the idea of being intimate with another woman for decades, but acted on this desire for the first time only recently. It was a wonderful experience that I'd love to repeat.

I'm 45, but still youthful in appearance...5'6", size 10, 34C, short blonde hair, pretty face. Spent most of my career working for large corporations, most recently as head of worldwide logistics. Several years ago, I established a consulting practice, focusing mainly on management training.

The drawback is that I live in the Washington, DC area. But in my limited experience with Craigslist, it seems the pickings are so slim when it comes to educated, refined women over 40, that it's worth reaching out even when the geography is challenging. I'm a New York area native and I do get down to your area regularly.

Photo is attached. Sorry it's so small; it's the only way it will fit the CL file size limit. If you'd like to discuss this further, I'd appreciate a photo and additional information on you.

Hope to hear from you,

Emma