Man v. Woman

Monday morning, I'm hiring my first underling. Assistant, I mean. We've finally gotten to the point where the five of us can no longer handle everything that goes on. And frankly, I'm everybody's bitch.

Looks like they've noticed that I'm going to need my own bitch. RLL's bitch.

I have two candidates that have made it through to interview with me. One man. One woman. Both equally qualified.

Monday, I'll interview them and pick a favorite. Thing is, I have no idea how to choose unless I ask a bunch of weird questions and find out who is more detail oriented, loves Chinese food and is willing to work 24/7. Because last night as I was brushing my teeth before bed, my cell buzzed and I came down to my computer to put out a fire.

Here's hoping next time, I have my own bitch to catch the fireballs for me!

Stubble and Gonads

I have a buddy at work. She's a tad younger, straight and quite the hottie. She's NEVER kissed a girl, despite my objections to this oversight on her part. I think you should try everything once...maybe twice, just to be sure.

How do you know you don't like kissing women if you've never kissed one?

That's when she asked, "Why don't you like kissing men?"

Frankly, I haven't kissed one in a while, so I had to remember. And then it hit me like a porcupine. Stubble. You just cannot avoid it with men. It's always growing and you will be stubbled.

Women are soft. Smooth. And luscious.

I forget sometimes why I love women so much. But after she asked why I didn't like men, it all came rushing back. Whiskers and balls. Enough said.

Earworm for the weekend.

I guarantee that you will not be able to get this out of your head for quite awhile.

Boobies and Kittens - watch more funny videos

You are welcome.

Psst. Here I am.

Yes, the ONE, the ONLY....

REAL LIVE LESBIAN.

Let's see. What's been up? Last week, I lay dying with the flu, after contracting and enjoying strep throat for the entire week before. Then it turned into bronchitis. I sound a bit like Brenda Vacarro, which used to be cool, but young folk have no idea who she is. I'm on my third round of antibiotics and I may be addicted to codeine cough syrup, but I don't care. Hey...if you have a contact on the black market...let me know. I'm down to my last refill.

My Love ROCKS. And tongues NEVER get stuck around here. I promise, start with a nice, slow back rub and that won't happen to you.

Around the house: We've put in an aggregate driveway. We have mud for a yard. Very expensive mud, too. Not that cheap mud that's right under the grass. We had this mud BROUGHT in. Brand new mud. The exterior of the house has been painted. Honestly, it's turning into the Log-majal. Mickey-T and Phfrankie Bondo (my only blog visitors so far) wouldn't even recognize the place!

My job. I prayed for a fantastic job that was challenging. I got it. Just got back from having three Tanqueray and Tonics with a co-worker on the company credit card. We laugh so hard that we cry. Regularly. It's a dream.

BUT, I get home and I'm tired. And I just want to have some wine and eat the dinner that my Love has cooked for me. I know. I suck. But I'll try to stop by and make it look like my blog again.

Do I have anything to say? Nah, but you don't really care, do you?