Ashes To Ashes

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Another guest post by Dana


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I have a bit of an obsession with death. Not in a "I want to die," way, but in a "If you bury me when I die I'll come back to haunt you" way. The thought of having my flesh eaten by bugs for decades so that family members can stick a plastic vase of fake flowers on my grave once a year just creeps me out. It won't happen ... not over my dead body!

So, since I was updating my will due to some significant life changes, I thought I'd include instructions on how I wanted to be "disposed" of.

*We now interrupt this blog post for a public service announcement*

Y'all do have wills, right?? If you don't you need to put one together. You can do it online in about 30 minutes. LegalZoom offers a basic will for $69.00. It's important. Everyone should have one even if you don't think you need one.

*We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog reading*

I thought it was time to do a little research. What? Researching funeral/cremation plans is morbid?? Nahhh ... it's practical! And honestly, a little fun in an odd sort of way.

I discovered there all some really imaginative ways to "dispose" of one's ashes. For example, you can be launched into space with a little help from Celestis.

Celestis made headlines in 1997 when they launched the cremated remains of 60’s icon Timothy Leary and Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry into space. For a fairly reasonable fee, you can send a “symbolic portion” of yourself on the next available mission, riding alongside a commercial or scientific satellite.

You can come back to Earth after the flight, or pay more to remain in orbit. You’ll stay there for an estimated 10 to 240 years before reentering the atmosphere in a blaze of fire. In the future, Celestis plans to launch cremated remains into the moon’s orbit, to the surface of the moon, and possibly into deep space.

But I'm thinking I might want more of a celebration than that. I discovered you can go out with a bang - literally - with the help of Heavens Above Fireworks.

Heavens Above Fireworks can pack a small portion of your ashes into professional-grade fireworks and stage a memorial display for your survivors. You can choose a big, noisy, colorful display or a quieter, more understated event.

Or, you can have your ashes stuffed into small, self-fired rockets, so your family can have their own private "safe and sane" fireworks ceremony at home. It would probably be the only time any part of me was considered safe and sane.

If I decided a more permanent display was up my alley, I could go with an Eternal Reef.

Have you always been an Ocean lover? You can create your own “living legacy” by having your ashes turned into an artificial coral reef. Your remains will help restore damaged reefs and create a nurturing marine environment for fish and other forms of sea life.

Eternal Reefs will mix your cremated remains (all of them) into concrete, shape the artificial reef and place the reef out on the sea floor.

I haven't decided yet, but whatever I decide I know one thing - I want friends and family to celebrate my life, not mourn my death - and in my will they'll be directed to wear Hawaiian shirts and flip-flops at the BBQ celebration ... yes, even if it's January in Chicago!

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