Friday, April 9, 2010

Bible Study is Gay

*NOTE* With permission I have hijacked RLL's blog today. Since she can't tell me "no" because she's too busy to even log on to her blog, I thought I'd share a little story of what I hope is a glimpse into the views of many of this country's youth ... and a sure sign that my 14-year old son has the capacity to learn that his belt should be used to hold his pants up ABOVE his butt.

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I volunteer for our church's middle school ministry and recently, during the small group Bible study portion of our Wednesday night gathering, Cam - my 14-year old son - was sent out of his small group for being disruptive.

As a side note, I truly believe there is some sort of exponential mathematical equation inbred in all children that gives them the calculated ability to find those moments that will cause their parents the greatest amount of embarrassment ... and seize them!

In an attempt to save face look like a responsible parent, I walked over to where he was sitting and asked what had happened. He told me they were talking about gay marriage in his small group and his leader told them that homosexuals were sinners. GAHHHH!

I love my church - I really do. It's the first church I have felt comfortable attending since my own teen years (long, long, LONG ago). I know where they stand on abortion (they value life) and where they stand on serving the community (they are all about reaching outside of the walls of the church), but I realized, at that moment, that I was not aware of their stance on homosexuality and same-sex marriage.

It was quite naive on my part. I just assumed that the caring, concern and inclusion I saw so much of in my church extended to ALL people ... not just all heterosexual people. I wondered what the fear was that would cause a 20-something, youth group volunteer to tell a bunch of 13 and 14 year old boys that loving someone was a sin. I wondered how many of those same boys have grown up in homes where they were taught to love everyone just as God does, but to be sure to find out their sexual preference first so that they knew whether to love them as a fellow Christ-follower or as a sinner. I wondered how I was going to reconcile this moral conflict for myself and for my son.

And then Cam told me the rest of the story.

When the small group leader insisted that homosexuality was a sin, Cam spoke up saying, "Doesn't God love everyone?"

His small group leader confirmed that yes, God loves everyone but that didn't mean homosexuality was OK. Homosexuality was still a sin and never OK in the eyes of God.

Cam then asked, "Aren't stealing, lying and killing sins too? And haven't you told us that God loves us even if we hurt Him by stealing, lying and killing?"

His small group leader apparently became a little flustered at this point and tried to backtrack.

Cam then looked at him and said, "That's what I thought. The Bible doesn't say it's a sin to love. God loves all people and doesn't care who they love. In fact, he wants all people to love each other. THAT is what the Bible says."

At that point he was told to leave the small group for thinking logically being disruptive.

After hearing the story, I realized that I didn't need to resolve any moral conflict for my son - he had resolved it for both of us - and hopefully for at least a few of the other young men in his group.

That exponential mathematical equation inbred in all children that gives them some sort of calculated ability to find those moments that will cause their parents the greatest amount of embarrassment? It works in an even greater capacity when it comes to pride, and at that moment I couldn't have been any more proud of my son's "disruptive" behavior.

~*~*~

26 comments:

we're doomed said...

Out of the mouth of the innocents comes words of wisdom. God bless Cam. I heard the same shit, plus the Jews will burn in Hell thingy. What would Jesus say and do? I think most of us know the answer to that question. Preach the love not the hate.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

WTG, Cam! You've raised a very secure and self aware young man there. I hope my children can see the same virtues - we have many gay friends and we don't differentiate on our love for them or our "straight" friends.

i am the diva said...

amazing!! your son gives me hope for the future...

Jay said...

Cam did the right thing there! He was totally right. Good job Camster!

BTW, don't worry about that perfect timing thing kids have, cause he's just about at the age where you will suddenly develop the same skill and will unwittingly pick the perfect spots to embarrass him. LOL ;-)

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...yes, logic has a way of disrupting alot of bible rhetoric...

Dana said...

we're doomed, when Cam told me the story I wondered how his small group leader was going to resolve the moral intolerance he was experiencing.

Evil Twin's Wife, I think Cam, as a bi-racial kid in a Wonder Bread small town, has been on the receiving end of ignorance his share of times and has little tolerance for it - especially from adults.

i am the diva, now if he would just pull his pants up I might really have hope!

Dana said...

Jay, I'm not sure Cam can live to 174 years old - it would take me at least that many years to make up for the number of times I've been on the receiving end of his perfect timing!

Phfrankie Bondo, I'm just glad my son has grasped what I believe to be the "intent" of the Bible!

Charlene said...

Fabulous story and post.

People who judge others "in the name of God" are sad. They are all about what you cannot do, say, feel.

I have no fear for the future.

Anonymous said...

He was thrown out for not complying with the brain-washing. Good job, Cam.

Dana said...

Charlene, thank you!

agingtomboy, I know it! Can you believe he had the audacity to question an adult? Trust me, this man child keeps me on my toes!

Karen said...

Moments like that prove that despite whatever has been going on what Cam in school, you are doing right by him in million other ways.

Anonymous said...

WTG, Cam!! I do agree with Cam and am glad to hear he pointed out logically! You're a GREAT mom!

SkylersDad said...

You son is awesome and warmed this lump of coal I have as a heart!

Dana said...

Karen, there was a time when I measured Cam's success (and mine as a parent) on his grades in school. Although grades are important, you are right - moments like this do prove that I am doing right by him.

Purity Lips, I don't know about the great mom part, but I do know he is a great kid!

SkylersDad, well ... THIS week he is awesome, but next week?? Who knows *giggle*

Anonymous said...

How I wish I could have been there to see the guy get so flustered. Big props to the son!!! Sounds like she is doing a great job with him :-)

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

I am so proud of your son...yes I am!!!!!!

Dana said...

Dragon, I wish I could have seen it too! The small group leader avoided me at the end of the evening. Not sure if that was because he thought I was the mother of the anti-Christ, or because he couldn't justify his position.

Bond, in this instance, me too!

Real Live Lesbian said...

I am finally HERE! At my own blog, where my oldest and dearest blog friend has posted one of the finest posts EVER!

I hope you really look at what happened and realize that it is a direct reflection of your value as a mother.

You ROCK as a mom and as a hijacker! ;)

Thanks.

Laura said...

I (and my ex at the time) were actually turned away from a Church that SUPPOSEDLY welcomed "all".

We were told (in an email) that "it might be in our best interest to find another place of worship - a place that would suit our needs better"...

...Nice huh?

James said...

Great post. Cam should get a big star or a thousand housepoints or whatever they give.
This young generation is the first to grow up without prejudice.
I have talked about this with "Christians". Homosexuality is only mentioned 4 times in the whole bible, 3 of those in the old Testament. I don't believe it is a sin but if it was it is not even important enough to get into the Ten commandments....and Jesus never mentioned it. So God doesn't seem to be as worried about it as some people are....

Vodka Mom said...

That story made my morning.


xx

Little T said...

That makes ME so proud of Cam for taking a stand! From the mouths of babes. The future is looking brighter!

Awake In Rochester said...

The young man is wise beyond his years. Good post!

Mike said...

You need to find an Oasis church in the Episcopal realm. And do it quick before they implode on each other. You can have some peaceful churchin' for awhile anyway.

Jaimey said...

Way to go Cam! (And Dana!) I find it hard not to question most of religion and especially when some moron spouts things of which he knows nothing, and can't even logically backup. It's people like that group leader that did it in for me and made me agnostic boardering on atheist. :)

Rachel Cotterill said...

Wow, I'm stunned that someone would get thrown out of a group for something like that. Good for him for sticking up for himself!